Bishop Auckland Veterans Rugby returned under the Friday night lights with a 77–73 thriller against Horden & Peterlee Vets; a scoreline that suggests either some outstanding attacking rugby, some optional defending, or most likely a healthy mixture of both.

This was veterans rugby exactly as it should be: chaotic, enthusiastic, surprisingly good in places, and played in absolutely brilliant spirits from start to finish.

Both sides traded tries like a Rocky film, except instead of punch after punch, it was try after try, right up until the final whistle. Bishop crossed for 11 tries and added 9 conversions, while Horden & Peterlee also scored 11 tries but, crucially, managed 11 conversions. So, as it turns out, kicking at goal does still matter, even in vets rugby.

There may need to be a quiet passport check on a few of the Horden & Peterlee lads, because for a veterans fixture there were definitely some suspiciously fresh legs on show. Either that, or they had very easy paper rounds over that side of the woods.

For Bishop, John Howard helped himself to a hat-trick and deservedly picked up Man of the Match. Unfortunately, he also produced one of the great conversion attempts of the evening, sending the ball across the ground like a lawnmower, which probably puts him firmly in contention for Ding of the Day as well.

John was also responsible for one of the strangest assists of the night, choosing to run the entire width of the pitch to physically place the ball into Semi’s hands rather than simply pass it along the line like a normal rugby player.

Semi himself produced some fantastic wing play, despite apparently still being a prop. Pedro Gray had an excellent game at scrum-half and may have discovered a calling late in his rugby career. Danny Ross typically led from the front, including a chip-and-chase try that probably looked even better in his head before he did it.

Pedro also got in on the chip-and-chase action with a superb try of his own, while Julian Dowson rolled back the years in his trademark washed-out lilac shorts, including a grubber kick and grounding the ball in what appeared to be the six-inch gap between the try line and the dead-ball line.

Jason Kennedy put in a massive shift, getting his shoulders into some serious contact, while Ross Nicholls also got properly stuck in. Larvin Clements unexpectedly came out of retirement yet again and rolled back the years, although at this point nobody is entirely sure how many retirements he has officially had.

JC produced a charging run that reminded everyone why running straight still has a place in the game, and Graeme Johnson’s lungs impressively managed to last longer than six minutes, which was a victory in itself.

There was also a fine moment from the Horden & Peterlee number 10, who attempted what can only be described as a back-heel grubber, got the ball tangled somewhere around his own feet, and managed to kick it two metres directly into touch inside his own 22. A moment of rugby innovation that the game may not yet be ready for.

A huge thank you goes to Horden & Peterlee for travelling over and playing the game in such a great spirit. It was exactly the sort of fixture veterans rugby should be about.

Massive thanks also to Trevor Alley for refereeing the game. His time, humour, and management of the evening were hugely appreciated by everyone involved.

Thanks as well to all the Bishop lads who pulled the shirt on, everyone who helped organise the night, the bar staff, volunteers, and supporters who helped make the evening happen.

Bishop now have two more veterans fixtures planned this season, including a return fixture away at Horden & Peterlee.

If this first game is anything to go by, Bishop Auckland Veterans Rugby is very much back.

Old boots. No egos. Good craic.